The Questions We Should be Asking...

A high school junior/senior's most dreaded question: What are you going to study?

For some, the answer is easy: Mechanical engineering! Physical therapy! Writing!  As adults, we're so thrilled these kids have a path and relieved their search is over. 

For others, the answer is this: [crickets chirping....]  

They are interested in lots of things: robotics and ceramics and math and cooking and Spanish and Greek plays... but they're not set on what they want to do forever. 

When I meet these students I forgo the "what-do-you-want-to-be-when-you-grow-up?" questions and instead focus on the "what-kind-of-life-do-you-want-to-live?" ones: 

1. Do you want to work with people or alone? 
2. With your hands or mind? 
3. Like noisy and loud or quiet and calm?
4. Inside? Outside? 
5. At a desk or moving around?
6. Are you logical or creative?
7. 9-5 or flextime or summers off?
8. Busy or same routine?
9. Secure and consistent or riskier and wilder? 
10. Do you like kids? The elderly? 
11. Do you want to children some day? Do you want to be on their schedule? 
12. Do you want to travel? Do you prefer to stay near home? 
13. City or rural or suburban? 
14. Tie or t-shirts?
15. Care about a commute? Work from home? 
16. Do you like to write? Do you like numbers? 
17. Where do you balance money v. fulfillment? (You can have both....)
18. Dogs vs. cats? (I throw that in to see if they're paying attention.)
19. Out in front as the face of something or behind the scenes?
20. Do you like to sell or dread it?
21. Do you like people? Do you like service? 
22. Do you want a service profession? Non-profit? Religious? Civic? 

Only after they answer these do I then ask: What are you good/bad at? Math, science, language, art? What moves you? 

Figuring out the life you want to lead first and then marrying these choices with your skills gives you the chance to create a path that you won't regret when you're 40.  

After all deciding you hate working in an office at a desk alone might not be the best career for a computer scientist. 

So, next time you start to utter that dreaded question, ask instead: What kind of life do you want to lead? Then listen.